Friday, February 10, 2012

Untitled, Chapter 2

Mary was seven the first time she became aware of her status.   For most little girls, you aren’t aware of much of that at seven.  There is some teasing and name-calling but for the most part, you play with the people you like and you don’t play with the people you don’t like.  Who those people are often changes every day. “Suzy wouldn’t share, so she’s not my friend.” “Hannah called me weird, I don’t want to play with her anymore.”

Mary, like many girls had a new best friend every week.  In her town, there was definitely enough to go around.  They weren’t hurting for seven year old little girls, especially in her class. 

She was put into a work group in her class at school, where she met Page.  They became instant friends.  Immediately they were planning to play after school. They didn’t live far from each other.  Close enough that they could meet each other in the middle without having their mom’s drive them. 

They would often meet in the park near by after they checked in at home.  They had been playing together for about 2 weeks with no friendship altering moments.  They shared well together without name-calling.   They both loved to play kitchen in the dirt at the park, using the fountain nearby to make all sorts of treats.  Each took turns being Mom, the most coveted role.

They had been happy friends until Page’s older sister, Phoebe came to get Page for dinner. 

“Who’s your friend, Page?”

Tuesday, January 31, 2012


"Margery?" Ellen yelled to her knew found friend. "Why do they talk to me that way?"

A pause follows as Ellen searches the air.

"Margery?" She speaks again, not deterred by the disappearing act her friend likes to play. "Why do they sit there so still?"

A man passes Ellen, sadness touches his eyes.

"Margery?" Ellen cries one more time. "Why must you play these games?"  Blank expression flows from Ellen's eyes.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Mom?  How are you feeling today?" A stranger whispers to Ellen.  She looks at him expectantly, knowing that this stranger bears some resemblance to her beloved Charlie.  She waits for Charlie to emerge from this kind man's eyes.  Charlie's doppelganger looks back at her with the same hope and expectation.  Each give up, pushing back the desire for a sweet reunion.

"Mom, its me, Phillip. Your Son."  Each word spoke, Phillip hopes will resonate in his mothers ears, bringing back all of those memories.

Ellen smiles remembering her little boy.  Confused, she wonders how her sweet little man could be this tall, broad shouldered, gentlemen in front of her.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Untitled, Chapter 1

Mary was your average teenager.  She had average looks, average intelligence, and average personality.  There was nothing about Mary that seemed to stand out to anyone other then her parents.  Mary spent her childhood and now high school career under the radar.  To many, Mary wasn’t even near the radar. 

Mary was OK with her status, for the most part.  In her school and community, to go unnoticed was a good thing.  There seemed to be two classes: the perfect and the unwanted.  There was the underground class of the invisibles.  Mary, fortunately, was in that group.  The perfects were the rich, talented, over-achievers who knew what they wanted, knew how to get it and nothing ever stopped them.  The Unwanteds were often the poor, marginalized, under-achievers.  They were often viewed as the dirt on the feet of the Perfects.  Something they stepped on, on their way to success. It was rare that the two ever mixed and even more rare when they switched places.  Being in the unclassifiable class wasn’t an issue for Mary and she planned to keep it that way.  That was until her invisibleness became not so invisible.

It all started the day that Mark Everstein moved into their classified town.  He was an instant Perfect but you’d never hear him call himself that.  Mark’s dad had been a New York City Defense Attorney but after a high profile case ended badly, Mark’s dad decided it was time to move his family to a less “high profile” town.  Little did he know that Lawrence, PA was a high profile community living in a low profile city.

Mark had an eye for the unnoticed.  The obvious and the cliché were like bright colors to a colorblind man.  He saw them but didn’t see what others saw.  What Mark did see was the blacks and whites and especially the grays.  He went out of his way to figure out what made them tick, what put them on the level they were at.  He found Mary pretty quickly.  To him, she was the brightest start.

The day they first met was forever stuck in Mary’s memory.  It would take her a while to figure out if this had become a good memory or a bad one.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Show Me Your Wings

Show me your wings
May i see how they expand over me
Show me your wings
As they shelter me from the elements
I wait and watch for your presence to land
I hope for a refuge, a place to rest

Show me your wings
May they take me to far away lands
Show me your wings
I have found so much peace in their midst
They pick me up from this broken ground
And set me on solid foundation

Monday, September 19, 2011


"How did I get here?" Angela thought to herself? "When did I sign up for this and why?" On mile 2 of 13.1, Angela wondered what could be wrong with her that she ever saw this as a good idea.

Angela and her best friend, Maggie, had decided six months ago to sign up for a half marathon in hopes that they'd be inspired to run more often. To give themselves credit, they had run far more then they had 6 months prior but this was borderline certifiable.

Angela was only on mile two and already she was bored and suffering. As she watched people pass her, she was sure she'd be the last person to finish. "There can't be that many people running this race,” she would think to herself.

The pain in her lungs was intense and she wasn't sure that she could suffer through it for eleven and a half more miles. Shaking out the stiffness in her arms, she pushed forward. Two miles was nothing. She ran that three to four times a week. Heck, ten miles wasn't that big a deal anymore. For the last three Saturdays they had run ten to twelve miles each. Now that it was race day, it seemed impossible.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011


Megan watched him drive away. 10 years of marriage fading away with taillights in the night. Just like that. No warning. No explanation. Jason just left. Leaving his five year old son, a crying heap in her arms. The man she loved had left a long time ago now the man she married was following suit.

She knew Jason was unhappy. She knew he was struggling with so many things; marriage, work, his faith and the loss of his parents two years ago. They had tried therapy, prayer, and constant arguing but nothing seemed to bring him back to her.

When Megan got home that night, she found him loading his car. The ache in her gut began immediately. There were no planned trips especially that would take that much luggage. What gave it away though was that he was loading up the Civic. He never drove that car. They had been trying to sell the car for over a year. It wasn't worth much, but she was sure it could get him where he needed to go.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011


Have you ever watched someone on the Uneven Bars? Its breathtaking how they maneuver so delicately between the bars. Just when you think they are going to crash into the bar, they are back up in the air soaring around, twisting and turning.  There is so much grace in the chaos that is this gymnastic event.

Much like those bars, my life had become a balancing act between my mom's personalities.  It wasn't until I 16 that a scientific label was put on the chaos that she was.  Manic Depressive Disorder, aka Bipolar disorder.

My mom could be the most graceful, giving person you would ever meet.  She could also be the most selfish, self-centered, egotistical, maniacal individual you ever met.  You never knew who you were going to meet that day.  Some days you didn't know if all 7 of her personalities would show up at once. I don't mean she was schizophrenic or suffering from multiple personalities.  She just could quite possibly have 7 different versions of herself.

The Helper.  
The Helper would make sure my sister Angie and I had all of our homework done and would help us with our various extra curricular activities.  She was quick to come to friends' rescue, "giving" of her self time and again.